(click title for image) Self acceptance. I’ve worked through a lot, struggled and swam up stream, but now I choose to shift my focus from what IS, to what I already feel good about. I’ve said before to ‘accept what is’, but trying to accept something we already feel negatively about can, and will often, build the momentum of negativity, as we try to force a change of thought or convince ourselves that what is, is acceptable. If you’re unhappy with it, why accept it?! To be at peace, we must turn our attention to things we already feel good about. Then little by little, simply by feeing good more of the time, the things we want will begin to manifest in our lives. There is always more coming but that doesn’t mean we wallow in a sense of lack, rather we celebrate everything we have and all that is to come. Wanting to be someone else would be a waste of who I am, even if that someone else is a version of my self I would hope to be. In any given moment, all we can do is make the best possible decision and I decide to appreciate and love myself. The worst loneliness is to abandon or condemn who you are, a sense of contentment is what allows us to feel complete. It is human nature to identify the negative, a survival instinct that no longer serves us. So give yourself grace when your self awareness brings to your attention the negative self talk that may be on repeat. As Im sure you’ve seen me say, anything we do in any given moment, we are training ourselves to be better at it. To allow criticism will only make it more challenging to love. What can you find that you appreciate about your body, your mind and your spirit? Chose to focus on the positive. Shift your attention to what makes you feel good, not just momentarily, but what you will appreciate was done, tomorrow, the next day and the next. Little by little the life you live will be the life you have always wanted.
Key to Balance
(click title for image) The key to balance is your awareness. Knowing when you’re beginning to lose it, and humility when you have. My mind needs metaphors so here’s how I see awareness: It’s very hard to look in a backpack while you still have it over both shoulders, and it’s impossible to put it down. But if you first pull your arms out, you can look inside to see if there’s anything you need to take with you/serving you/in balance, and if not, you can set it down. This is the practice of Satya, truthfulness. Another one of the 5 presented in Patanjali’s 8 Fold Path, the moral, ethical and societal guidelines, similar to that of the Ten Commandments, that lead to a conscious, unitive life. The meaning of Satya has two layers- empirical truth of reality, and abstract truth of being, which ultimately transcend to the basic virtue of honesty. Honesty with the two layers, the world around us and with ourselves. We may not always know ‘the’ truth, be it internally or externally, but we know if we are creating, sustaining or expressing falsehood. The underlying cause of which is usually passion. With passion we lie to ourselves and those around us. For lovers, for food, for money and more. In order to practice Satya, it is important to keep our focus on the unchanging, the pure, while gaining awareness of that which changes, our passions. We do this by creating time to literally breathe. Allowing space for the cerebral cortex, our thinking brain, to consider the two layers of Satya (the eternal reality, and that which we perceive as reality but is simply our temporary, fleeting experience, fueled by passion) before the emotional brain takes over and takes off. This time and space gives us strength to respond, versus react, to the world around us. We observe with discernment as to what is not helping us serve our higher purpose, because it is often easier to identify falsehood than truth, it’s instinct, it’s a survival skill. What does serve us is in harmony with ultimate reality, what doesn’t, isn’t real. When we observe, there is a disconnect, which makes it easier to let imbalances go, because we are already detached from them. So gain balance, practice Satya.
Aparigraha
(click title for image)Like a child, I saw this beautiful, flower shaped, Lodgepole Pine cone and declared, “Ooooo, pretty!!”, immediately followed by “Mine!”. So @mxdblake says to me, “Now you have to let it go”, and he was right. He knows I’m working on Aparigraha, the virtue of non-possessiveness, or non-grasping. Krishna is quoted saying, “Let your concern be with the action alone, and never with the fruits of action. Do not let the results of your action be your motive, and do not be attached to inaction”. This implies freedom from controlling the outcome. The Bible says, “Your heart will always be where your treasure is.” So we stood on a bridge above a creek, and in secret, I made a wish/sent an intention, a seed of manifestation that would grow just as the pine cone will evolve. Then, I let it go. It was non climactic. It didn’t fall and float away in slow motion to some heartfelt song, honestly we didn’t even get to see it float away, it probably got stuck in a pile of debris... but again, none of this is for a climactic ending. It’s the experience of what IS. The idea of letting go of physical and energetic baggage. Learning that I don’t need to possess something in order to prove my adoration for it, that I don’t need to own certain brands in order to be a good Yogini, because my value is not measured by my possessions. What’s more, is being able to share that perspective with others. If the people you associate with, make you feel like the external defines you, time to do some social spring cleaning. Maybe it’s not material, maybe it’s diet. Overindulgence, this is a form of hoarding, taking more than you need. Aparigraha- The word ‘graha’ means to take, to seize, or to grab, ‘pari’ means ‘on all sides’, and the prefix ‘a’ negates the word itself - basically, it means ‘non’. Keep in mind, I’m not saying not to wear clothes that make you feel confident or indulge in dessert, especially not to bring the outside in (I’ve gone pretty far out of my way to do just that). What I am saying is that it’s important to surround yourself with a community that will support and encourage you, to make fleeting moments growing experiences, and above all, to be free. Free to BE!
It's not Cirque Du Soleil
(click title for image) So often people are too intimidated to practice yoga because of the impression that the end result is performing a shape. Remember that the bodies around you, are in 'their shapes', you create your own. Have a genuine curiosity about your abilities in that moment, see where your body can take you if you excuse your mind. Politely get it out of your way, drop the ego and feel the postures. There is so much science behind each and every posture. We trigger pressure points to stimulate the nervous system, we activate lymph nodes to boost immunity, we soothe the adrenals, and so on. Remember that the experience on the mat is a reflection of the rest of life. We have all been given the blessing and opportunity of life and we all have our passions, limitations and challenges that come along with that. The postures you see are as varied as individuals in the room, their posture is a reflection of their present moment, allow yourself to arrive into your own. The past is relative to the one remembering (often misremembering) and the future is an illusion, the present moment is the only place where life can be found. We go to yoga practice, not yoga performance, show up for yourself and experience your ever changing practice!
Gain Control by Letting Go
(click title for image) When I'm encouraging my students to find stillness in mountain pose, to avoid fidgeting, wiping their sweat or fixing their clothes, I say to them, "if you can learn to tolerate the discomfort that's within your control, how much easier will it be to tolerate the discomfort that is outside of your control!? You don't need to control what's happening outside of you, to have control of your experience." Yoga is an art and it's also a discipline, we put ourselves into uncomfortable situations to gain strength, through re-labeling sensations we are reprogramming our minds. We turn our world upside down and all the while, we never stop reaching, grasping onto a new perspective, a new way of thinking, a new way of seeing the world. How blessed are we, to gain so much strength and control, by learning to let go?!
Believe in Yourself
(click title for image) Whatever you're doing, at any given moment, you're training yourself to be better at it. This includes negative self talk. You are innately magnificent and your internal dialogue should reflect this. If you're just beginning to retrain your mind, remember that it will take time and like any muscle, with consistency and repetition you will strengthen the pathways of positive thinking. Be compassionate with yourself. If you already have a tendency to get down on yourself, it's most important that the transition from negative to positive self perception, does not become another angle in which you can jab yourself from. Stay observant and believe in yourself!
Your Answers Aren't in the Fridge
(click title for image) The best advice I ever got in regard to my dysfunctional relationship with food, was to ask myself, "am I empty or am I full?". If I really take the time to meditate on this question prior to over consuming, I often find that I'm attempting to fill an emotional void or distract myself from some sort of discomfort. Much like our minds encourage us to fidget, during what should be periods of stillness, in our yoga practice. It takes time to begin to accept what is, to be in the discomfort and learn to eventually step outside of the sensations and simply be the observer. The good news is that anything we are doing, at any given moment, we are training ourselves to be better at it, so by getting out of our own way, we strengthen our ability to develop acceptance, contentedness, self reflection and observation. Voids begin to fill and we can begin to live a life full of abundance!
You ARE greatness!
(click title for image) No more telling myself what I want, I speak of what I have. No more telling myself what I need to do, I speak of what I'm doing. No more telling myself what I wish I could do, I speak of what I'm capable of. Because I am pure potentiality and my life is bursting at the seems with passion! Live a life of contentment, so that you are better equipped to be happy for others. If we are constantly telling ourselves what we aren't, what we don't have and what we think we need, we are stuck in the mentality that we live in a deficit. Understand that you already have everything you could ever need. In the words of one of the greatest yoga teachers I've ever had "You're full of greatness, you come from greatness, you ARE greatness!".
Impermanence
(click title for image) Impermanence is a constant, change is consistent and so we practice flexibility. Flexibility in mind and in body. Practice with patience because the practice itself meets a new challenge, moment to moment. Move through resistance in the body and meet resistance in the mind with a smile. Honor and understand these are signals are only intended to protect you, so have gratitude for your capable and loving psyche and physique, then gently excuse yourself. Allow yourself to move past these temporary blockages. They may have been necessary in a time past, but the time is now, and now, you have everything you need and every reason to smile.
Chakra Work
(click title for image) In a Yin class I explain how important it is to hold uncomfortable front extensions, because in doing so, we allow the body to wring out neurochemicals (baggage) which are housed in the fascia along the front sheath of the body, primarily the hips. I use the analogy of doing dishes- When you wring out a dish cloth and see the dirty water running out, you continue to wring until the water runs clear. We wouldn’t get much done if we just stopped doing dishes when we saw the dirty water.
We hold postures, and practice postures, until the discomfort dissipates and we are relieved of those unprocessed emotions.
I practice what I preach and have been actively cutting cords and ties to unhealthy relationships. This means I have been dealing more with chakra balancing but the concept of determination despite discomfort remains true.
I have focused a great deal of energy in doing so and have experienced some discomfort in the rear part of my solar plexus chakra. Struggling with this pain I was relieved to learn of the bi-directional nature of the chakras.
The front of the chakras relate to the manifest, whereas the back aspect of the chakras relate to the connection to the un-manifest world, or our potentiality. The front side of the third chakra works with our desires and willpower in the world, while the backside goes into our belief system in relation to our worth and sense of self.
Beings with blocked or deficient third chakra may allow life to pass by. Abusive relationships can wreak havoc on the solar plexus chakra because they set up patterns of behaviour and belief which drain your power. It can be very helpful to cut the cord of attachment to an abusive partner. Cutting these cords of attachment can help to break the cycle of attracting abusive partners.
I realized that not only had I been severing toxic cords but that in my desperate attempt to protect myself from experiencing the kind of emotional abuse I had in the past, I was not allowing myself to receive the the profundity and richness that was being offered to me. I found relief as my research reassured me that any beliefs that I have created about myself that are simply not true, can and are being worked on by continuing to balance the posterior solar plexus chakra through increasing my awareness and raising my frequency. I have begun to allow myself to receive, to accept that I am worthy of love, of joy, and the admiration of all the weirdness that makes me, me.
The main challenge for the third chakra is to be proactive rather then reactive or inactive. Understand your value and allow yourself to manifest AND receive!
(For those of you out there who might be able to relate to some of what I've written here but aren’t quite familiar with chakras or aren’t sure where to begin in order to soothe the 3rd, I recommend watching Amy Cuddy’s TED talk on ‘power poses’ – how to alter your body language and posture to increase confidence).
My Scorpion Progress
(click title for image) Slowly but surely my toes will reach my head. It's so important to take your time and enjoy the posture, whatever variation of it your body invites you to do today is ok, as long as you're practicing satya & ahimsa, non-violence and truthfulness. People hear nonviolence and assume this is easily done, but this means not beating yourself up about the shape you are, or aren't, making. Truthfulness means being honest with yourself... what are the limitations you're dealing with in the moment and is that really pain you're telling yourself you're experiencing or is that just discomfort? 😜 Our minds can be very convincing. Appreciate where you are today, remember that there is no finish line and luckily, we get the rest of our lives to practice!
Down Dog 101
(click title for image) DownDog 101: In this photo I'm holding the infamous downward facing dog or Adho mukha śvānāsana. Notice how my fingers are spread wide? I can feel the webbing of my hands stretching, I'm pushing into the ground with ALL of my knuckles, to save my wrists from arthritis pain. I'm also actively pressing the ground away, avoiding sinking into my shoulders. My knees are slightly bent here, because it's much more important to have a nice, long, straight spine, than it is to have straight legs. The focus is always alignment, avoid sacrificing your alignment for false depth. Yoga is more than a physical practice, when you're having to prioritize in a posture, and make decisions that are best for the body, possibly challenging the ego, you're strengthening integrity. I love being in the studio as the sun comes up, as I am here. When my body feels stiff or I feel impatient with myself, I shift my focus from discomfort, to the vivid colors dancing through the sky. Observing how fast they change, I remember how fleeting each sense and sensation is and I'm comforted in knowing that this discomfort too shall pass. Have patience with yourself, honor your body, breathe where you are, right here, right now and observe...
Practice vs. Performance
(click title for image) We have the belief that achieving a shape (image of perfection) will result in positive emotions. This desire to achieve is natural. But performing a shape won't effectively change our emotional state. It won't change what we believe about ourselves or the inner voices that have lead us to those beliefs. Maybe you disagree, I used to. I would argue, "that feeling I get after nailing a posture, that makes me happy!" But holding a shape never changed my core belief of not being good enough, or altered my long term habit of self rejection. I would simply have a higher goal to achieve. It's a matter of belief, beliefs that create emotions of insecurity and fear. The emotions are just the symptom of core beliefs, a construct of our imagination. Recognize that in order to observe a "self" image, you simply cannot *be* the image, you're the one doing the looking. Creating a bit of detachment from our false vision of perfection, helps to shift our perspective. Easier once we have broken our belief in that image of perfection, or what we think we will get from it. Without it, we no longer have the comparison reinforcing the unworthy image. Without it, we are free. Free to lift our faces, pull our shoulders back and open our hearts to all that we deserve.
Unfiltered
(click title for image) Ok so I'm not the type to post photos of myself scantily clad, but I wanted to emphasize to those of you who have watched my body change over the past year, that I may look thin, especially while swimming in all my winter gear here in the PNW, but I AM STRONG! My passion to improve my life, body and mind, so that I am more capable of helping my clients improve, is also stronger than ever. Those of you who know me, know the transitions I went through in 2016, and those of you who don't know me, I want to assure you that I know as well as you do, the struggle is real. But if you get out of your own way, and stop letting other people's insecurities hold you down, the sky isn't even the limit. It's a little nerve wracking posting a pic like this. I didn't add a filter to this photo, I didn't spend time even trying to get the right shot. This is just me buzzing around the house in my underwear lol but I wanted to make myself vulnerable, to put myself out there and show everyone that you can be lean and mean! I hear a lot of women say that they avoid lifting or doing resistance work because they are worried about bulking up. Hopefully this is the evidence you need to reaffirm that a well balanced fitness regime will always give you what you need. The body is much smarter than we give it credit for, it's our minds that get in the way. Stay open to possibilities. Don't compare yourself with anyone else, not with me, or the infinite number of other public figures out there. If you're ever going to make a comparison, do it with yourself. Also, avoid making assumptions or judgements about what other people have going on under their clothes and in their skin. We are all fighting our own battles. The best thing you can do is (mind your business lol and) live out your beliefs. Im never going to preach anything I'm not practicing. So, on that note, here's one last thing; you CAN be a vegan and have plenty of muscle, plenty of energy and plenty of strength. Now get out there and break those chains, it's 2017 and you deserve to be free!
Move with Intention
Coming out of the posture is just as important as coming into it. We build memory in all that we do, be mindful, always, in ALL WAYS. Everything we do, we are teaching ourselves to be better at it. Loving, judging, falling.... Be intentional with your body, even if your intention is to move organically and spontaneously, give yourself purpose. Feel the difference. Then take all these principles off the mat and into the world. The way you leave someone's life is just as important as the way you came into it....
"Let that shit go"
If you have to force it, leave it. Relationships, postures, friendships, perfect ponytails; in the words of one of my favorite Yoginis, "let that shit go"! Sometimes those are the words of wisdom we need to hear. Always give your best, remain transparent & fervent in your beliefs, decide what they are & live a life that reflects them. Engage! Then release! Ebb & flow... I ask my students every day, "what are you engaging that isn't serving you?". The answer can be anywhere from muscles to conversations & relationships. If you're living a life within your beliefs & you feel the weight of exterior factors, let them go. The Yoga is in the release of the posture, not in the effort. Everything we do, is to prepare for stillness... I know many people who are uncomfortable alone in their own company, I've been there. I was hanging onto thoughts, perspectives & ideas that didn't serve me & I needed to let them go, in order to achieve Peace in stillness. Be tender with yourself, be tender with others, be yourself & allow them to be themselves. It's simply a happier life of acceptance when you release yourself from the expectation to fill your blueprint of an ideal.
Pure Potentiality
Before we are told fairies aren't real, before life gets ahold of us, we are pure potentiality. Even still, yet as we age we forget we have a choice. What to DO with pure potentiality? What IS pure potentiality? Chopra defines it as follows, "The source of all creation is pure consciousness . . . pure potentiality seeking expression from the unmanifest to the manifest. And when we realize that our true Self is one of pure potentiality, we align with the power that manifests everything in nature." For those of you who have taken my Yin Yoga classes, you know how much I encourage us to build our awareness that everything is within, nothing is without... How can you turn inward? No criticism, no judgement. Just get curious about yourself the way you would with a love interest, let this be an intimate journey. You are worth getting to know. You are worthy of attention, patience, grace, gratitude, love and affection. You are boundless. Now what will you do?!
Satya
Satya is the Sanskrit word for truth. It also refers to virtue, being truthful in one's thought, speech and action; The virtuous restraint from falsehood and distortion of reality in one's expressions and actions. Keeping this in mind we move through life, aware of the things that bring to light, or create discomfort, with Satya, honesty. Honest Awareness. Be honest with yourself, there is a difference between pain and discomfort. Only you experience your felt sense and only you can distinguish the difference. Pain is a healthy warning from the body, discomfort is perspective. Often times we are comfortable with dysfunction, because it is all that we know. As we begin to rebuild healthy habits and ways of thinking, we may feel uncomfortable, and many people allow this discomfort to discourage them. Honestly reflect and ask yourself what might I be comfortable with, that is not serving my higher purpose? What might I need, that I avoid because of discomfort? There is no judgement during this self reflection, just honor yourself as you are, right here, right now. The first step to anything, is simply having awareness of it.